Every morning I wake with such high hopes. Well, maybe they are not "high" hopes if I compared them with yours but they are hopes of what I may be able to do that day. Most days my hopes are not realized and today looks like it is going to be another let down. I just dusted and moved the printer a couple of feet - no more than a metre. My body is already saying "That's enough thank you" and I am beginning to doubt if I will be able to have a shower and then get out on the scooter some time today. They were my hopes for the day because I have been getting a little better each day I rest and I have already missed out on a BBQ with Jan and Mandy. I thought that by today, my time had come. You just cannot tell when you first open your eyes and all the hopes flash through your mind. It can seem quite feasible while you are still horizontal in bed after a good night's sleep and you scan your body as to how it feels. Getting up is usually enough to send those hopes packing but today they lasted a bit longer which in itself is a good sign.
I have been getting that "faint" feeling every day since I went for a short stroll last Saturday with S. I have been feeling like I want to pass out and my stomach gets nauseous at the same time as the sounds in my ears seem to echo and ring. I don't even have to be on my feet. Sitting upright has been enough to make it happen so that my habit of sitting in the garage in the sun or at the front door in the sun has not been possible for long. Similarly the desktop computer. I can only hope this post-exertion response is worse than usual not because it has now become the norm but because S has been quite sick with a sore throat ever since he arrived which could mean that my body is fighting to stabilize two things rather than just one. I have not caught his bug per se. I have had a lot of mucous in my head that I can blow out in the morning and that's about it. Last night my throat was a bit stingy though.
He left for home late yesterday afternoon after doing a bit of pruning for me. So far he seems quite "normal" and maybe it is a positive response to Effexor. He has a two week trial of samples but that's all unless he goes back to the doctor who was a one off. He changes doctors like he changes email addresses, phone numbers and living arrangements.
Next week he plans to go to live in Brisbane at another share house. It is a good price. He has not been officially accepted yet though so he could be living in hope just like I do. He felt good about an interview with Canon Printers in Maroochydore he had on Monday but it means being short-listed and re-interviewed. He is also catching the train to Brisbane on Friday for an interview with Chrome Real Estate (or some such name). The good thing about that last one is that it pays a weekly wage and not just commission.
I feel a little less "heady" sitting down writing this but my best chances of getting a longer run at pottering around the house would be if I would just go back to bed an lie down. The sun is gloriously shining and it is the last thing I want to do but I think I will grab ten minutes horizontal at least and keep hoping for .....later.